The Scientist

Come up to meet you, tell you I'm sorry

You don't know how lovely you are

I had to find you, tell you I need you

Tell you I set you apart

Tell me your secrets, and ask me your questions

Oh let's go back to the start

Running in circles, coming up tails

Heads on a science apart

Nobody said it was easy

It's such a shame for us to part

Nobody said it was easy

No one ever said it would be this hard

Oh, take me back to the start.

I was just guessing at numbers and figures

Pulling the puzzles apart

Questions of science, science and progress

Do not speak as loud as my heart

And tell me you love me, come back and haunt me

Oh and I rush to the start

Running in circles, chasing our tails

Coming back as we are

Nobody said it was easy

Oh it's such a shame for us to part

Nobody said it was easy

No one ever said it would be so hard

I'm going back to the start

Summed up in a song.

Rent

I feel like a vice is squeezing my chest.

What do I do?

I love you more than anything in this world (cept G-sus) even being okay with possibly destroying my friendship of 11 years with Ms. Cow.  I would do anything for you.

Pffh The reason why this is so hard though, is because I grew up as the third child.  Four years apart from siblings meant a lot of lonely games and a hell of a lot of imagination.  It meant being small and overshadowed, watching and listening to older sisters that I will forever be looking up to.  I stayed out of the way mostly and kept to my own little world.

I never really had to argue with my parents.  That was a job for my older sisters.  I was the good kid who agreed with everything and did everything mommy and daddy wanted.

You remember my wrist-cutting problem.  I remember at the time reading an article about cutting. It said: teenagers who cut and employ self-mutilation are most often the "good kids" who outwardly seem like the ones who have good grades, friends, and are generally happy."

Where do you think I learned to hide my true feelings?

Do you even understand the feeling when you hear something that absolutely kills you inside and you have to act like you're fine?

You are the most important thing that has ever happened to me and all I say is "Okay"

what the fuck is wrong with me

Is this all part of some stupid teenage rebellion when I pretend that I'm not dying inside?

Why do I do it? Why do I act towards my parents like I don't care about the restrictions they are putting on me?  Why do I put on a face so they don't see how I really feel about you?  Why do I always act like nothing affects me? Why do I pretend like my heart isn't being shredded to pieces? Why?

I'm afraid.

I'm afraid of things not in the status quo.  I'm afraid of a bad home life.  I'm afraid of being cut off.  I'm afraid telling the truth.  I'm afraid of disappointing people.  I'm afraid of losing this incredible life that I have been so richly blessed with.  But most of all, I'm afraid of losing you.

When you called me tonight, I was so close to breaking down and sobbing my eyes out, but just knowing that you will always love me kept me straight and mercifully saved me from any awkward questions in the middle of church.

But now that dam has burst.

All I want is to just be able to be with you when you need me, to support you in all that you do, to love you forever.  All of this is my own stupid fucking fault.  If I had just done what I should have done in the first place, none of this would be happening right now.  

I was selfish. So fucking selfish.

I don't deserve you for being that selfish.  You've been nothing but understanding and supporting of me, through all my inadequacies and roller coaster emotions.  

Hearing you tonight, saying that if this didn't work out with my family,  you said you couldn't wait for me, not because I'm not worth it, but because that three years is a very long time to wait. You said you would focus on furthering yourself, in mind and body, while not actively seeking anyone, and that you would always love me, no matter what.  You said that we would change, change into someone we didn't fall in love with, changing into Strangers, Again.  Hearing you say that reminded me just how much you mean to me.

"Every relationship goes through states.  Where and how each stage develops is ultimately up to each person.  While we always hope for the best, we often can't avoid the inevitable." -Wong Fu Productions

I will always hope and I will always love you.

Lyrics of the Day:

The best thing about tonight's that we're not fighting

Could it be that we have been this way before

I know you don't think that I am trying

I know you're wearing thin down to the core

But hold your breath

Because tonight will be the night that I will fall for you over again

Don't make me change my mind

Or I won't live to see another day

I swear its true

Because a man like you is impossible to find

You're impossible to find

This is not what I intended

I always swore to you I'd never fall apart

You always thought that I was stronger

I may have failed but...

I have loved you from the start.

-Secondhand Serenade: Fall for you

Watch all of the video. Especially starting at 13:50.

THE ENDDD

woooooooooowwwwwwwwwww
so I have OFFICIALLY ended my freshman year of college!!!
err technically I guess I'm going to be second semester sophomore haha

welp its been a pretty great year. I haven't made as many friends as I would have liked but I made a fair number that I know I'll keep in contact with next year.   probably...maybe..

Also, sadness.  Last night meant my last night of snuggling up with Mr. AHHCHOO in bed :(
Even if he is snorer, drooler, cover-hogger, face-smacking with elbows-er, super morning breather, mattress asser, he is still my snuggle buddy <3

He is gonna be pretty busy this summer with his internship so hopefully I can find a job. My plan is to apply to all the frozen yogurt places in my city hahah

anyways I can't believe I JUST found out about this but apparently at Appalachian they had a "hunger games" where they got to kill of other tributes by stabbing their balloons or stealing their flags.
SPEAKING OF THE HUNGER GAMES, I wrote my last English paper on the differences between the hunger games and battle royale. GUESS WHO GOT AN AAAAAAAAAAAAAA
THIS GUY. girl...

So I just unlocked a new character in LoL..Varus.
hahah those guys... Varus is an archer and his name is also a medical term for a knee deformity.
lololololololoolololol i see what you did there..

hmm anyways its almost 4am!!
goodnight everyone!

Lyrics of the Day:
School's out for summer
School's out forever
School's been blown to pieces


No more pencils
No more books
No more teacher's dirty looks
School's Out- Alice Cooper

Drunk

Oh gosh. What's wrong with me.

Wow I rag on Mr. AHHCHOO all the time about drinking and then I get hammered..

also..

lusting? totally not my style.

Too much

Do you even notice?

You're addicted.

Lyrics of the Day:

Bucket full of tears

babe you know Im here

Im here waiting

Close your precious eyes

and just realize

Im still fighting

For you to be with me

and sit under this tree

and we can watch the sunrise,

we can watch the sunrise

Wake up feel the air that Im breathin

I cant explain this feeling that Im feelin

I wont go another day without you

I know it feels

like no ones around

but baby you’re wrong

Just get rid of the fear

promise that Im here

I’ll never be gone

So baby come with me

we can fly away and we can watch the

stars shine

And baby you can be my love

Oh

Wake up feel the air that Im breathin

I cant explain this feeling that Im feelin

I wont go another day without you

Without you

Hold on I promise its gets brighter

and when it rains I’ll hold you even tighter

I won’t go another day without you

Without you

This is me tonight

no more games and no more lies

and I know its right

cause of the way you look into my eyes

and when I hold you tight

the worries disappear Im glad you’re in my life

Wake up feel the air that Im breathin

I cant explain this feeling that Im feelin

I wont go another day without you

Hold on I promise its gets brighter

and when it rains I’ll hold you even tighter

I won’t go another day without you

Without you

And I won’t go another day,

Without you

AJ Rafael: Without You

FINALSSSSSSS

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH ITS FINALS TIME.

I took my Chinese final this morning, wasn't that bad..it was basically a glorified quiz

My Calc II exam is innnnnn t-minus 1hour 50 min

Tomorrow I've got plant bio and natural resources :(

BUTTTTTTTTTTTTT THEN I"M DONE!

hahahahah Mr. AHHCHOO isn't done until NEXT thursday

hmm what to do over break...i've got a little over a month of freeeeeedom.

Oh Ms. H1 is coming back from Arizona..she moved there this summer for a job with ASU.

I've got to make H1 and H2 shirts T_T

I finished most of my christmas shopping..err that is..family and Mr. AHHCHOO so far...not sure if i have enough money for everybody else >_>

oh! i went a little crazy the other day and bought myself a gamecube because i was reading all about the new Zelda game: Skyward Sword and then i really wanted to play all the zelda games including Wind Waker which is on gamecube

buuuuuuuuuttttttttttttt luckily Mr. Bra said i could have his windwaker game :DD

so lucky..its hard to find on the internet

ANDDDDDDDD Mr. Sven said i could play his Skyward Sword over break too cause he will be in Taiwan :DDD

oh yeah. and i have to get my wisdom teeth out the day after Mr. AHHCHOO's birthday :(

OH annnnnnnnnndddd WICKED IS BACKKKKKK!!!!!

I super duper want to go watch again...but we missed the priority tickets deadline T_T

getting regular tickets is so hard!

T minus1 hour and 41 minutes :(

Lyrics of the Day:

Zelda theeeeeeeeeeeemme song whateverrrrrrr it is

-Legend of Zeldaaaa

LOL

Sooo yesterday I thought maybe Mr. AHHCHOO and I could go bowling because we had been wanting to for a couple of weeks or so now.

BUTTTTTTTT no we just played LOL which is a spinoff of WoW.

hahahah so dorky. we played for like 7 hours.

We played with Mr. AHHCHOO's friend Mr. Gucci over the phone.

we totally trolled this one guy in a game. he was being really flaky

THEN Mr. AHHCHOO goes "shut the f**k up nigga"

hahahahahahahahahahah but we think the kid was pretty young cause he didn't get mad and just played along with it.

Turkey Day

Wowww its been a long time since I've posted on here. Lets pick up from where I left off..

Well in my last post I said I still hadn't gotten an acceptance letter from any college.

ahem. Shortly after that I received on from Campbell with $40,000 scholarship, Clemson with my desired major, and NCState with my desired hometown. Where did I go?

DUH. NCSTATE.

2011 has been a great year. I graduated, I got a decent summer job, I got to spend 3 amazing months with the love of my life, I started college, and I know who I'm marrying :)

Oh Mr. AHHCHOO. He makes me laugh, he makes me cry. He makes me sad, angry, and happy..sometimes at the same time! Some people might think their boyfriends are perfect but yeah..i admit it he's far from perfect. I'm not stupid, I'm just facing real life. He snores and drools when he sleeps, he yells at me when he does math, we get into fights, it gets real.

But this is what I want. A real relationship. Not something out of Hollywood or fantasy, but a real, solid relationship. You might say that oh no we're too young for something so serious or that I really shouldn't settle for one person so soon. But I have a pretty darn good feeling that this is it for me :)

So here we are, near the end of my first semester there...hopefully 1st of only 4. I plan on transferring to UNC after sophomore year. Hopefully Mr. AHHCHOO will go with me. He said he would but every time he says it in a resigned way so I'm a little unsure...

The people we like best are at UNC. Mr. Sven, Mr. Bra; and Ms. DonkyKeung and Ms. VVN will most likely end up there. And asian people look better in blue hahah

Well..it is Thanksgiving Day

I'm thankful for a lot of things.

-A wonderful home to live in

-A wonderful family to live with

-The opportunity to go to school and not have to worry about tuition

-Getting to live in A'MURICA

-Having been saved by Christ

-Having lots of special friends who love me

-And pretty importantly: Having a man who loves me for who I am, nerdiness and all.

Lyrics of the Day:

Thank you for the cross, Lord

Thank you for the price you paid

-Hillsong United, Worthy is the Lamb

Teenage Angst

Life is crap.

1. Was failing Calc BC, not failing anymore but still basically am.

2. My mom threatened to take away the car

3.Still haven't gotten an acceptance letter

I am a terrible person, Mr. AHHCHOO. I know I texted you that about 15 minutes ago...but like when people ask me what your interests are or I'm trying to think of what to get you for Christmas or your birthday...I come up pretty blank.

Of course I could always say that your interests include wrestling, longboarding, and me...but what else?

I should know things like this. It makes me think of the days when we first started talking.

What the hell did we even talk about?

I feel like we don't even have much in common...all I know is that somehow I love you a lot.

I know we've been getting into a lot of fights lately and I think we've been taking each other for granted. We've just been pushing things onto each other without any consideration for each other's feelings. Due to ...recent events, I really don't want this to end at all. As naive, idiotic, and cliche as this sounds, I wanna be with you for the rest of my life. I told you once that when I pictured my life in 10 years, my goal was to be rich and successful, not married to AHHCHOO. But you're a huge part of my life now, in fact my world revolves around you. I was talking to Mr. Sven earlier tonight and about how our text messages would go something like this: AHHCHOO AHHCHOO AHHCHOO AHHCHOO AHHCHOO AHHCHOO AHHCHOO AHHCHOO MS. COW AHHCHOO AHHCHOO MR. JONAS AHHCHOO AHHCHOO AHHCHOO AHHCHOO AHHCHOO AHHCHOO AHHCHOO MR. SVEN AHHCHOO AHHCHOO AHHCHOO AHHCHOO. Without you, I'm pretty sure my world would collapse. This is dumb but the only book example I can think of right now is in New Moon when Edward left Bella...

Anyways, I just wanted to say that I hope this doesn't make you upset even though I'm really upset with myself and we SHOULD go back to the olden days of our long messages...once you get a new computer. That's password protected. From the JOYCHOO.

I need to know you. On a subatomic level. I want to be a AHHCHOO expert.

oh by the way. We made it past the 500 day pact ;D

and sorry I'm a jerk about your braces. you know i'm no good with my words and feelings so consider it my way of being sad about you having them in college. but like i said SUPERHOT when its over :/

and sorry I'm a jerk in general.

Hug it out? oh wait. this was a pretty one-sided conversation...

Lyrics of the Day

"If you ever find yourself stuck in the middle of the sea

I'll sail the world to find you

And if you ever forget how much you really mean to me
Every day I will remind you

You'll always have my shoulder when you cry
I'll never let go
Never say goodbye"

-Bruno Mars, Count on Me

The Drive-Reduction Theory

drive reduction theory- the idea that a physiological need creates an aroused tension state (a drive) that motivates an organism to satisfy the need.

what is the best way to calm down my drive?

If it is consuming me subconsciously, then it can be fulfilled consciously.

UGH. yousuck.

Lyrics of the Day:

So if it's just tonight
The animal inside, let it live then die
Like it's the end of time
Like everything inside
Let it live then die

-Kesha, Animal

so close.

soooooo last night was really good :)

two whole hours...phew

lets try it again sometime, but next time don't give your naughties away and it might be better :)

Lyrics of the day

"Lets go all the way tonight.

No regrets, just love.

You make me feel like i'm livin a Teenage dream

the way you turn me on. I can't sleep

lets run away and don't ever look back, don't ever look back

My heart stops when you look at me

Just one touch, now baby I believe

This is real"

-Katy Perry, Teenage Dream

MOWHAWKKK

Do it.

Shave your head into a mowhawk.

if you don't then...Puck you.

Lyrics

"Where it began, I can't begin to knowing But then I know it's growing strong Was in the spring, And spring became the summer Who'd believe you'd come along

Hands, touching hands, reaching out Touching me, touching you Oh, sweet Caroline Good times never seem so good I've been inclined to believe it never would

Oh, sweet Caroline Good times never seem so good I've been inclined to believe it never would oooh oh no no.. "

-Puck from The Glee Cast, Sweet Caroline.

D'AWWWWWWWWWW

5th = You. I learned you don't have to constantly be or talk to someone to feel loved. You don't constantly need their attention or give them your attention because if you really love someone and believe they love you, you should just know. That intimacy is nice, but it can wait. If its the right person, it'll happen sooner or later even though its hard to wait. That you have to make sacrifices for other people. That I'm no longer making decisions that only affect me. That God and Jesus love me more than anyone else can. That I have to stay faithful. That little things mean more than big things. I'm pretty sure I learned more in my 5th relationship, than my first 4. So hopefully you don't think fifth is so bad anymore.

Lyrics of the Day

"I'm lucky I'm in love with my best friend

Lucky to have been where I have been
Lucky to be coming home again
I'm lucky we're in love every way"

-Jason Mraz&Colbie Caillat, Lucky

Mr. AHHCHOO would say this...

"So it was doubly dismaying to me, after we had finished lovemaking and were lying side by side holding hands, when he said , "Lily, I've got to talk to you about something." His voice was serious, too serious.

I felt my heart shrivel.

"What?" I asked, trying to sound casual. I pulled the sheet up.

"It's your quads, Lily"

"My...quadriceps?" I said incredulously.

"You really need to work on them," Marshall told me.

I turned to stare at him. "I have scars all over my abdomen, I have scratches across my face, I have a huge bruise on my ribs, and your only remark about my body is that I need to work on my quads?"

"You're perfect except for your quads."

"You...jerk!" Torn between amusement and disbelief, I pulled the pillow from under my head and hit him with it."

-Shakespeare's Landlord by Charlaine Harris

Lyrics of the Day

"You're a jerk! (I know)"

-New Boyz

but I seem to like you so it's okay.

FRUSTRATION

THIS WEEKEND WAS TERRIBLE.

1. I was sick
2. My mother made me stay home all weekend
3. I wasn't allowed to go the the NCSSM party
4. I wasn't allowed to go to the State Fair
5. I got an unexcused absence at work
6. I didn't get to spend a whopping 24 hours with Mr. AHHCHOO
7. H1 made me go to the library with her for 4 hours..
8. ...while everybody else was at the fair
9. H1 made me pay for her dinner
10. I had to go to work on Sunday
11. My dad took my car on Monday...okay that's past the weekend

I realized something this weekend.

I write really well in frustration.

I finished my Carolina essays.

Lyrics of the Day

"It's all your fault...It's not fair"

P!nk-All Your Fault

anticipation

I hate anticipation.

Why? Because it sucks.

And this is not anticipation for something good.

Sorry =/

Lyrics of the Day

It's your life, you can do what you want

Do what you like, but please don't leave me waitin'

Please don't leave me waitin'

-Green Day, Tired of Waiting

Day 42...been a while......

WOOHOO FIRST PAYCHECK!!

It was only $78.37 but hey..whatevs.

My mom thinks its really annoying when I go grocery shopping with her now because I have to say every single PLU code for the produce cause I'm still trying to figure them out...it'll be like "ooh green peppers!...4065!!!!!!...hey look bananas!....4011!!!!....mangoes!...4959!!!!!...etc"

So I've been helping out with this volleyball camp for like little 9-12 year olds and...I really don't understand why every single summer my sister and I sacrifice a week of our summer to do this camp for little people who don't get any better at volleyball than they were before the camp and we sacrifice our bodies so that the little people can feel somewhat good about themselves...gosh my knees are busted up. nasty.

anyways tonight and tomorrow is the long awaited BEACH TRIPPPPPP!!!!!!!!!!!

hollers.

but i still don't get why we're going to myrtle instead of wilmington....

There's ten more days to go.

I feel terrible about the situation but hey...there's nothing I can really do...:/

Lyrics of the Day

"Girls don't like boys, girls like cars and money"

-Good Charlotte, Girls and Boys

In response to Ms. SheenieinaBottle's Big Mouth post...

Sooo Ms. Sheen...I just gotta say...you handle your anger a lot better than I do.
You actually let it out and let other people see it.
I've always kept it inside...my mom has always said that she thinks other people get along with me so well because I'm so passive...not always a good thing.
Whenever I get angry my brain shuts down and is at a standstill...I'm not like you Ms. Sheen, my angry disrespect doesn't roll like fat...so I'm passive because I really can't think of anything to say or how to act so I just let it slide and bury it. Oh sidenote but I really can't stand other people when they're crying...the fact that I don't know how to act then either coupled with the fact that often they're crying over something trivial just annoys me to no end.
Anyways I let my anger out in stupid ways.

Story #1
My middle-school volleyball coach was a pretty intimidating person. I'm pretty sure that no one on our team liked her. She yelled at pretty much everyone...but she never really yelled at me cause I guess I was pretty good at that age having two sisters that had already taught me some volleyball...so I never really messed up that badly. But I never really had beef with her. Last game of the season: We were doing pretty crappy and DUN DUN DUN I messed up. She yelled at me.
Now I don't usually hold grudges...I don't even hold one against Ms. Slinky (yeah yeah I couldn't come up with a better name) but I hold one against this woman. You might be thinking,"wow that's a stupid reason to hold a grudge."
no. excuse my french but this woman was a bitch. It wasn't that she yelled at me but that she was such a pain-in-the-arse to everyone...all the time!
To this day whenever I see her and the assistant coach at our high school games...I never acknowledge her. No I hug the other lady...she's nice, she was my algebra teacher but not my coach.
And from what I hear from kids who go to middle school there, she's still a bitch.

Story #2
I pretty much went behind my best friend's back and talked to people she told me never to come into contact with again. And was pretty much the reason for her boyfriend to break up with her.
I find this ironic though because I only went behind her back to talk to that person I was forbidden from talking to because I wanted the whole story before just listening to her...she is my best friend but she is also known for lying...and because she went and talked to this person she was explicitly forbidden from talking to by her boyfriend.
Yeah I get that she's mad at me now but this whole thing was really a bit of everyone involved's fault. Mine for talking to the person I was told never to come in contact with again and for telling her boyfriend things about her past. The person I was told to never come in contact again with for talking to me and her and for sending her boyfriend an email. Her boyfriend for not setting his foot down when he already gave her a second chance to be honest with him. Hers for talking with the person she was told never to come in contact with again.
I just wanna say that I did it because I was tired of your bs and I really don't regret it.
I just wanted him to know what he was getting himself into.
You always say that it pisses you off when people call you a hoebag. Well stop giving them reason to think that.
I just wanted all of this done with and solved and you to get some drama out of your life(Yes I know, it probably wasn't the best way for me to approach the situation) because your emotions have been on a ridiculous rollercoaster this past year and a half. I care about you and it kinda sucks when I'm here watching you hurt yourself pretty much on purpose both emotionally and physically. It's really frustrating to me because I really don't know how to help you.

I got sidetracked a tad but for those of you not mentioned you can tell that I will be evil and horrible and mean and awful even to those I care about once I've had enough bs from them.

Story#3
In the time frame of 7th grade up until even the 10th grade, I didn't have a good solid outlet for letting go of my anger. Sure volleyball helped some, I really love the game but even that lost some of the magic over time. I would get so angry at people and I would hold it inside for so long that it would get warped and I would wonder if it was all my fault.
Soo I turned to cutting myself.
It was a sick sort of fascination when I cut..I only cut deep enough for blood to come..it would distract me from my anger and I would sit and wonder about the human body and its complexity(is that a word?) Sometimes I would punch my solid wood dresser to try and make my knuckles bleed. I even shattered a window and used the glass shards to see if there would be a different cut than scissors or a swiss army knife
My mom found out about it one day but I just told her that I was "experimenting"
I guess in some strange way I was telling the half-truth. I was trying to figure out just how far I had to cut before it would bleed and then how deep before the pain overcame the anger.
Being the obedient asian child, I stopped doing it on a regular basis when she told me to stop. But up until a year ago I still did it when I was feeling really really angry or stressed out.
Last year when I was really bugged out by English I pulled out my swiss army knife while studying vocabulary and started sawing at the book with the "serrated edge" to see if it would cut at all because it was supersuper blunt and surprisingly it did. So I tried to see if it would cut me.
If you ask me to see the scars now, well they're really faint. I never cut so deep that I actually wanted to kill myself...I just wanted to hurt something, anything and see the blood. And now that I'm tan(somewhat) they're pretty much invisible and it's only because I know where they are that I can find them.

I stopped doing it 1) when I saw my best friend doing it and I realized that she had is soo much worse than I did and I couldn't even bear to see her hurt herself 2) when I met Mr. AHHCHOO and heard his story and I just wanted to help him rebuild his life after last year's events and I decided that we both can't be the stupid one in the relationship 3) I really started pursuing a legitimate relationship with God.
Praying to God and letting out your burden to him really is the best stress and anger reliever there is.

You might ask me WHY?? Some people have told me, "BUT YOU LOOKS SO HAPPY ALL THE TIME"
well don't they always tell you that it's usually the ones that look happy and have a seemingly perfect life on the outside?
And everyone has made some stupid idiotic moronic (excusethefrench) shit-for-brains mistake in their past. Mine just happened to be self-mutilation.

I would also appreciate it if those of you reading this don't tell other people. You select few I have shared this blog with I consider close to me. We've all seen how people's lives have been ruined by gossip.

LyricS of the Day
Jesus take the wheel
Take it from my hands
Cause I can't do this on my own
I'm letting go
So give me one more chance
To save me from this road I'm on
Jesus take the wheel
-Carrie Underwood: Jesus Take the Wheel

Everybody makes mistakes...
-Hannah Montana: Nobody's Perfect

Day 16

Soooo its story time.

This morning on the way to church as usual I had just grabbed something to eat on my way out the door and today it was a slice of pizza. Well we were almost to church, I was in mid-bite annnnnnnnnnd all of a sudden.........I really had to throw up.

It was almost as bad as that one time at the end of 30HFamine when I was really sick and I suddenly had to throw up and disappeared to the bathroom for like 15 minutes and Mr. AHHCHOO got all worried and came out after me and was waiting for me and awwwwwww :)

anyways I was really freaked out because just last night I had read a book about this girl who had gotten pregnant and had really really had morning sickness.....

I tried not to make any noise cause if I did throw up...well I'd have a lot of questions to answer. So I just did the whole breathe deeply through your nose and keep trying to swallow thing.
I managed to get it under control but the whole time in my head I kept thinking, "WTF IS THIS??!!? WE HAVEN'T EVEN DONE THAT YET!!!!!!"

Alrighty guys, I'm just going to leave you with that to ponder.

Lyrics of the Day:
So I hopped on a train three in the afternoon
I don't know when I'm coming back, but I hope that it's soon
See, I never thought (Never thought)
That I'd have to leave your side (Your side)

It's only physically but know that you will be on my mind
Twenty-four hours at a time
Cause in my eyes, you were mine (You were mine)
-AJ Rafael: She Was Mine

Days 14&15

Sooo these past few days have been really boring...Waldo has been keeping me company though.
Yeah we were stuck in Roswell annnnnd this town sucks. The "airport" is terrible..it only flies to two places..LAX or DFW.
Yesterday morning when we went to the "airport" they had apparently cancelled the flight to DFW that morning...but fortunately my mom had gotten us seats assigned already. BUT then that flight got delayed because of the flight that had gotten cancelled SO by the time we got to DFW we had JUST missed the flight back to RDU :(
SO we had to spend the night at DFW...Ms. VVN was saying "MY POOR BABY but the airport is really nice! Ms. Sheen says to go eat taco bell" hahahaha Ms. Sheen...
yeah the airport was nice when we were in the AA lounge and they had disney channel and cots and stuff BUT then the jerks kicked everyone out of the lounge when half of us were already asleep!!! Something about people had been stealing cots from the airport?? buttt then then let us take cots out of the lounge?! logical much?
Yeah so I slept on the airport bench...yeah its pretty comfortable when you're sitting up but laying down?!! no. Especially the kind that has armrests. My mom was like "OH yeah you're small! you can fit!"
UNCOMFORTABLE. If I moved my head then my chin would hit an armrest. I could'nt move my legs cause they were trapped under an armrest..I couldn't move my feet cause they were trapped too. But sometime around 4 am I moved to the cot because my parents couldn't sleep.
that was better. I looked like a hobo apparently cause its really hot in Texas right? well they kept the air conditioning on full-blast. I went to sleep with shorts and a hoodie on. I woke up wearing jeans and two hoodies and all sorts of clothing piled on top of me. WHUT?! Apparently I do all sorts of things in the middle of the night...like flap my wrists ;)
Yeah but we finally got on a flight back to RDU and I had pulled out Waldo because we were in row 7 which is right behind 1st class and doesn't have any carryon storage and I thought maybe I would search for Waldo on the flight. Nope. As soon as the three of us got on the plane we all passed out. woke up for free drinks! passed out again woke up when the plane landed.

When Ms. H20 and Ms. H1 picked us up, Ms. H1 was like, "OHHH HELLLOOOOO WELCOME TO AMERICAAA." while bowing and attempting a fobby japanese accent.
We had landed at like 10 and got home at like 11. I passed out on my bed again.
I had a weird and strangely elaborate dream about the Simpsons. I woke up and it was 5pm.

new: I'm doing a lyrics of the day thing now just because i think my posts are too bland.

Lyrics of the Day
"You make me wanna dance
Cuz I'm happy but just know that I can't dance
So I'm sorry in advance"
-AJ Rafael: Showstopper